I am heartened by the donations I have received from a handful of donors. It means I am not poring from empty into the void, but that I am resonating with a few good people. Truth is not for the masses. It simply can’t be, because the masses want a feel-good philosophy that reassures them as to their worth.
We are worthy, but not as egos. My ego wants to be rich and famous, as do they all. But destiny trumps ego every blessed time. Had you told me I would end up hammering out thousands of notes online and gotten almost no pay for it, I would not have believed I had it in me. But have it in me, I do!
My time is free and I can do with it what I like. Oh, wait a minute. That is the opposite of what is really true. The fact is….I can only do what I can do.
Sitting with Vernon Howard and listening to him on tape for years on end, I must have absorbed more than I thought I did. The dream I had last night of being rocked by a wise female was saying the same thing Vernon said to me in a dream. “Don’t be so accommodating.”
It is not up to me to explain myself to people that would not understand. It is up to me that I surrender to my gift. If that sounds like bragging, remember that I give this away for free. For everyone that donates, a hundred more never do. But I keep at it.
Most of you know that I am at the point of trying to stay open to what is. Today it came in the form of a dead tree in my yard threatening a neighbor’s fence and yard. I will have it cut down next week to the tune of $1400. It is a massive hardwood that is hard to get to. But I could be sued if it fell and harmed their property. Sometimes you just have to do the right thing.
Again, your donations are always warmly welcomed. If you read something that hits you right between the eyes, it is usually because something is lurking in your unconscious that needs to be cut down like that old tree. Expensive to your pride and false sense of security, yes. But worth its weight in gold to be true to yourself.
All work is on the self. Anything else is a huge waste of time. Don’t fall for the do-gooders that would have you working yourself to death for nothing. Spiritual work always pays off. Start within. Start now. Start where it hurts the most.