Tonight I watched the HBO documentary about growing old and loved it. The title is, “If You’re Not in the Obit, Eat Breakfast.” It seems the key for many of these folks that are active into their nineties involves doing what they love. I will be 75 this fall. Enjoying good health at this point, I nevertheless have moved into the Age of Age. I laugh. As hard as my life has been, aging is really very easy compared to the middle years of my life.
At 32 I heard words that brought me to my knees. “Your daughter has rhabdomyosarcoma. We will operate at once.”
At 57 I heard the words from my husband’s oncologist, “We will begin chemo as soon as the port is put in.”
Those were the worst times of my life. Now I am in a spectacular period. I am going to get cataract surgery in a few weeks and may be able to lose my glasses. Admittedly, I will look like a baby field mouse more than likely. Today I took my prescription to be filled for all kinds of pre-surgery and post-surgery eye drops.
I have come into my own as a writer and since I love writing, this is amazing good fortune. No, the books don’t sell. No, I don’t go out into the world teaching. Yes, I do lunch with like-minded people! It is great fun to sit at a lunch table doing nothing but enjoying the moment. I am not a night owl; that is why lunch suits me to a tee.
At lunch nothing happens and then nothing happens again. And dessert can happen. I started lunching with my friend Tallulah almost 15 years ago. We have an imaginary circle of grace around us, a force field of magic that has never failed us. Not once.
And there are a few others who like doing lunch. There is no commitment except to the moment. No pressure to perform. Nothing to live up to. If this appeals to you, I am available. Sometimes a nice lunch works wonders on people stressed to the max.
I have also learned to love eating lunch out alone. Sometimes Vicki values the experience of sitting across from no one at the table. She never has to share her dessert on those days.