Someone who has also suffered severe losses says that shame accompanies the losses. Because society is into deep denial about grief. It wants to us quickly achieve a new normal and shut up about our feelings. I don’t discuss loss with my friends; I save it for my writing. Here I can open my heart to what is true for me. I have loved and lost and will not ever see those dear lost ones again. Why shouldn’t I grieve them?

The holidays in our culture are ninety-nine percent commercially driven. It is not a matter of realization of what the Christ-consciousness is. For me, the Christ-consciousness was never closer to me than when I was in deep grief. The compassion of God is all-consuming. He bends down to those of us who cry to him. And often He gives us something to do. In my case, you are reading it.

In case you wonder, I also have a good life, albeit a quiet one. I devote myself to truth, to being kind to myself and simplifying my life. I say no a good deal when something isn’t right for me. A holy no that leads to a holy yes.  So don’t feel sorry for me. I do that enough myself. Then I cry and feel better and write some more. And crack wise and say outrageous things that lead me to know one thing. I am actually enough to bridge the gap between yesterday and tomorrow. I am the Self in all its glory, bending down and rising up again and again.