We all dream of permanence, a quality that only exists in the “I am” state of awareness. The ego seeks what the “I am” already is and has. This proves problematic and keeps the dual state of mind in full operation. There are no solutions to this perennial problem except to acknowledge your impermanence.

Even so-called enlightened people suffer insecurities about who they are. They may say otherwise, but you need not believe them.

Thank God, the non-duality trend has almost died out online. Some of us have begin to speak the truth about our human frailties. This is refreshing, because lies help no one, not even the liar.

We must fight long and hard for our salvation; for everything there is a price and a season. You don’t have to envy those that claim to have had an awakening. There are too many of those tales floating about. Had they not read so many books about it, they would not have known how to describe it.

I have had no experience of awakening. Just a long series of jolts that shook me to my human core. That human core is eroding day by day by day. In its place I find an emptiness that is sometimes peaceful, sometimes not.

I remain one hundred per cent human and one hundred per cent divine. Flawed and forgiven. Crucified and rising. The mystery of death, that no one can penetrate, still stands ahead of me.

I spend my days simply, with as little conflict as possible. At times, I am bored and restless. At other times I am in a state of deep peace. Such is life. Such is our human existence. I have experienced the thunder and lightning of loss. It covers the landscape of the soul with heartache. It is then that I both forget and remember who I am and in that state of paradox I seek and find the light.

Vicki Woodyard