I have been on the road for such a long time. I have ascended the hills and gone deep into the valleys. I never had quite enough food to sustain me for more than a day. Surprisingly, this has been enough. I always feel hungry for more, however. That seems to be what keeps us going on this journey.
Yes, I know. You want me to tell you who I am and where my journey will end. If I knew, I would be happy to tell you. But I see that I have been living in disguise this lifetime. And you are, too. That goes without saying. As I speak these words to you, I see that you are not in the hands that are typing these words but here in presence with me. So you know that something weird has always been going on.
Sometimes I meet up with others who manifest in the same extraordinary way. They start out as words typed on the screen and I look up and see that the nothing has become something. This happens in my dreams at night as well. I have both good ones and bad ones but ultimately I wake up.
Do you ever notice how few genuinely happy times there are? The road goes up and down and our legs get tired but somehow a mood of discouragement is ever present. It’s because we want something so bad we can taste it.
I notice that you aren’t talking. Well, it’s always that way. Sooner or later I remember that this is just a dream and that where I am going is really alone into the Alone, as someone once phrased it. I have to keep making this journey of self-discovery. Keep popping the bubble that someone has materialized to join me. Once I do that, I am like an amnesiac regaining her memory.
You know what? I remember who I am and that the only journey I have ever been on is not a journey but this very remembrance of who I am. Then I enter the silence, which materializes when the road disappears. Ah. Now I remember. I will see you again and won’t remember. But then again, neither will you.