God has the upper hand. Always has. Always will. Until I come to that final understanding, my ego will keep putting its hand into the cookie jar. Oh, I will have cookies, but they won’t be satisfying. I will continue to want more and bigger ones.
The divine plan is that I learn the lesson in the paragraph above. He will do whatever it takes to teach me this. He will allow me to bang my head against the wall of His Heart until I grow so weary I sit on the floor and weep. That is what I have been doing this summer. This long hot summer of learning.
There is only one lesson in the conscious classroom. Instead of learning it, we get all ADD; we play the class clown, we play hooky, we rationalize, we dramatize, etc. And the whole time God is in charge.
The day God puts His Foot down should be a day of rejoicing but we are too stupid to see that. We are too inert to see the signs that are being given as one door after another closes on our feeble little attempts to run our own lives.
We all know that He sends rowboats, helicopters and any other necessary vehicles to rescue us, but we are wearing blinders. What can He do but put His Foot on our obtuse little necks?
He only keeps it there until we cry, not uncle, but “Father.” And we add, “Thy will be done.” And it immediately is. We see, as the scales fall off our eyes, that only His Will can be done, for our will is but an illusion. An illusion that never works. That is the lesson plan. There is no way around the curriculum.
For me, the lesson right now is about success. I am a chosen vessel (we all are) and I can only be poured when God tips the pitcher, so to speak. Then people have access to pure water and I have done my job.
If we are all vessels of the One, why do we not drink ceaselessly from that one pure cup? Instead of doing that, we are drinking polluted water from condemned wells. These are inner wells, not outer ones. They have labels like “Love, Success, Adulation, Comfort.” But as we drink, we sicken because the labels were incorrect. They should have read “Do not drink.” And we would have grown thirsty enough for the water of life.
I am satisfied that I am ignorant of my one true need. Only love can quaff my thirst and I will pour a drink for the next thirsty pilgrim.